Life Throws You Curve Balls, You Learn to hit them out of the Park!

Money

Life, Heartbreak, Torment, and Suicide prevention and awareness

Okay so it has been quite a while since I last posted an actual post minus the recipes. Well, something happened Christmas Eve that has changed my life forever. And now I am NOT being overly dramatic about this. I am quite serious. In fact, if you are going to act that way then leave. LOL (sorry had to add humor as what you are about to read is a little depressing, sad, etc.)

So, we, Adam and I, had moved into a new apartment on November 1st, 2012. Well we were all fine and dandy and living the life thinking things were going to be okay, but come to find out they weren’t. Adam started getting bug bites. I wasn’t. This triggered some of his mental issues he had in the past. Come to find out that the bites were from bed bugs. Who would have thought our DREAM apartment complex turned into a nightmare in a matter of days? Well, the first was on a Thursday, we by the following Tuesday evening temporarily moved into a hotel. (This started our hotel hopping for about two weeks). This stopped the bites. Now the time to wait for the apartment people to FINALLY do their job. Our DREAM apartment complex, turned nightmare in a matter of days, about two months later it became more of a nightmare than I would have imagined (keep reading to find out what).

So we had gathered up the essentials and our guinea pigs in their temporary cages. (We had gotten a new one since one of our other ones had passed away a week before the move.) They still weren’t getting along so we had two separate temporary cages. Fun, right? OH YEA. LOADS. lol

So we spent a week and a half in a hotel, then on November 12th, 2012 I had to have my thyroid removal (see other post for more on this). My Great friend/sister took the piggies for a few days for us. I stayed in the hospital over night and the next day went to our home away from home. FUN. At least the hotel staff were nice. So on Wednesday I had dropped off a blanket for a cat at the humane society. On Thursday Adam had his WORST bout of mental issues he had since we moved to Colorado Springs. He ended up checking himself into the hospital hoping they would help him with his medication. They didn’t. in fact they were taking him off EVERYTHING without trying to prevent seizures (a side effect if taken off a medication without trying to prevent them or not stopping gradually). So as you can see things are already bad. I was JUST released from the hospital two days prior. In pain, and not having the person who helped relieve it by just being there for me. I knew he had to take care of himself before he could take care of anyone else. So on Thursday I talked to him and on Friday I had no idea what hospital he was in because he never had the chance to call me back and when I called the hospital that I THOUGHT (I knew in my mind he was there) he was at they said IF he is here we will give him your message. They NEVER EVER gave him my messages!!!! HOW RUDE!!! So on Sunday they let him check out against doctor’s orders.

We did a few errands to get stuff situated before going home. We could now go back to the apartment because a treatment had been done on Friday and it was now Sunday. So we went and picked up the piggies and went back to the apartment to find a HUGE mess from the treatment company. We had to call the police thinking that the shotgun was stolen. At this point in time I WISH it had been stolen. It would have caused me less heartache in the end. But no changing things now and no what if is going to change anything. So we called the third party people about the issues and had to have a neighbor help pick up the heavy boxes as I still couldn’t lift things. (I was only a week out from surgery.) So fun fun. As I was sitting on the phone waiting to talk to people I saw ANOTHER bed bug. The treatment DIDN’T WORK!!!! At this point we were out of money and couldn’t go back to hotels. We were stuck. so we lived with it. Two weeks later they did another treatment. We stayed with a friend for the day. The treatment, again, DIDN’T WORK. Bed bugs were still there full force. At this point I just wanted to burn the place down. It would solve everyone’s problem. At this point we are now into December. I was healing, but not fast enough. Adam was at his worst that he had EVER been. We were FINALLY able to get him in to see people, but things just weren’t working. Why was this happening to us??? We did good when we could, we helped others when we could. We even helped when we were struggling ourselves. Again, the what if’s now will not change a thing.

So, I am already back on my normal schedule of working at the college and going to classes. FINALLY, classes end. Still no news on what the next step is with the treatment company. Which is sort of annoying. We didn’t have the money to move out, even if they did refund our deposit. We just didn’t know what we were going to do. So the week before Christmas I worked more than I usually did because my schedule had changed. Allowing me to work more hours, and the fact that being it was “winter break” I could work 40 hours instead of the normal 20 during the semester. I was working hard knowing that we needed the money. We had a rough weekend. We stayed at my friends so I can do as much laundry as I possibly could so it was done and over with. We stayed there that night because Adam couldn’t stand our apartment. Not only was it invaded by pests, but two people and two guinea pigs were living in a small 300 square foot apartment. Yea, not that great of a time. Due to the bed bugs we couldn’t move into our “permanent” apartment because they had to finish renovating it. They didn’t want to finish because they wanted to get rid of the bugs first. (New carpet and bed bugs do not mix). So that weekend he spent a lot of time at our friends house because he felt safer. That was okay with me because some things had lapsed since not really being there then being there and being unable to do much do to surgery, and the mess the treatment company made, etc. So I tried to get things done, but I was worried about Adam.

On Christmas Eve some instances are blurred others are what others tell me, and some still have blanks. So bear with me please. That morning Adam woke me up yelling in one of this “fits” again. His new meds weren’t quite working. They do take time to kick in and he only JUST started taking them the week before. He finally found enough cash to go get cigarettes and he finally calmed down enough to lay down and rest.

A couple hours later he started freaking out again. He got another bug bite. And he had a SEVERE reaction to the bugs. He had HUGE welts from them. So he had gone into the bathroom to smoke out the window. He started saying many things. I don’t remember much of what he was saying. I was sitting five feet from the bathroom door (remember 300 sq foot apartment) and the door was open. I had JUST made some lunch. I was hungry. I remember him asking if there was more and I said yea, its in the pan and that I didn’t dish him up any because I wasn’t sure if he wanted any. (He hadn’t been eating much and I wasn’t going to force him. Why should I force someone to eat if they aren’t hungry?) He then started flipping out again and asking if he was sterile and unable to have children. (I’ll explain more later). Then said he was going to kill himself. I don’t remember him grabbing the gun. Normally it is NOT loaded. Now remember the size of the apartment, where I am sitting and where the door is located to the bathroom. He was sitting on the toilet and the next thing I know I heard a LOUD bang and saw his head whip back and the bullet enter his head. I ran from the room screaming. I had the phone in my hand. I didn’t know what else to do other than go get neighbors to help me figure out what to do. I was already on the phone with 911.  They had put me on hold. Yes, ON HOLD. Granted it was like 30 seconds, but that 30 seconds was the longest time of my life. I was sitting in the hallway and one of the neighbors, THANK GOODNESS, (I still need to send her and my other neighbors a thank you note) was home. She sat in the hallway with me while I was on the phone with 911. I don’t remember the call. I remember vaguely walking out to the porch to wait and the cops showing up first. Three cop cars I believe, there could have been more. I don’t remember. Then the fire truck (first responders), then the ambulance  The police went in first to secure the “scene”. One had come out to the first responders and said that he thinks he (Adam) is still breathing. I thought thank god that means they can save him right?? I was wrong. The ambulance people went in and the first responders came out saying that they were hooking him up to machines. 5 LONG minutes later I saw the fire chief come out and look at one of the police officers shake his head. I knew then. My heart dropped out of my chest. It couldn’t be. NO, it can’t be. Then the ambulance people started walking out the front door of the apartment building with all their things. If I was standing I know I would have fallen to the ground crying, begging for them to try some more. To save him. To breath life into his lovely face again. To hold him to be able to kiss him again. To tell him I love him ONE more time.

From this point forward I don’t remember much. I remember bits and pieces, the rest has been pieced together by friends who had showed up to help me.

I remember walking to the chaplain’s car (the one that works with the police department) I remember it took a lot to get me there because I refused to leave the porch. I guess I was shivering really bad from the cold, but refused to put socks or shoes on. I just wanted to cry, yell, scream, and beg. I wanted to go back in time. In my mind I pleaded with god to please let me redo the day. Let me insist earlier that he get help before it actually got this bad. Again, what if’s do not help.

I remember vaguely being moved to a friend’s car and my other friend showing up. (My saviors that day.) This is where things got fuzzy. I remember people talking and they were whispering out of ear shot. I just wanted to yell. I wanted to scream at them to talk to ME. I just wanted to scream at them at everyone. I was screaming, but on the inside, no one could hear me. I wanted to die. For all I know I was dying on the inside. I felt dead. I wished I was. This worried my friends to no end. They didn’t know I had one motivating factor keeping me from killing myself. My family, my mom, my little brother, my siblings, my grandma, everyone. I couldn’t do it to them. As much as I want to be with Adam again. I can’t do it to them. As much as my heart aches I can’t. I’d rather live with this unbearable pain then to make someone else go through what I am going through.

This is where I don’t remember, but someone filled in. I supposedly became unresponsive to the point I wasn’t even looking at anyone. I was told that it came to the point of barely breathing and that someone had to actually hold my head up. My friend was afraid I was in shock. (Wouldn’t you be too if you just saw what you saw and just lost the love of your life?) I think I heard her say later she was mad that the ambulance people didn’t check me out before they left the first time (yes they had to come back). At this point she told me that she had to tell them to get an ambulance. When the ambulance got there, I briefly remember having climbed on the stretcher and put in the ambulance. I remember shaking violently. I don’t know if it was the cold, shock or a combination. (I was still in my night gown). They then took vitals. By this time I started to come back to. At least somewhat. I remember the police having to do something with my hands to test for gun residue. I wanted to kick and scream at them. Asking them if they were nuts to think I would do something like that to him??? I started to pull into myself again. I briefly remember the ambulance person asking if I wanted to go to the hospital. I told him no, but my friends insisted. My heart rate was really high. Now many who know me, know, I HATE taking medication and refuse to take it if I don’t have to, this includes having to go to a hospital. Bad things happen at hospitals.

I sort of remember the ambulance ride. I remember thinking I could so easily kill myself in here. It wouldn’t be that hard. The medicine cabinet was right next to me. it was unlocked. I remember debating it, I even almost opened it. That’s when I thought, why?? I would hurt my family and I couldn’t do that to them. By the time I almost got the courage to just do it and get it over with, we were at the hospital. My opportunity was gone. I remember being wheeled in and they gave me a room. I was now at the hospital, all by myself. I wanted to yell and scream. I wanted to punch the wall. I wanted to die. I was already dead on the inside. I went to the nurse I had to use the restroom. By the time I came back to my room a couple “friends” (I use the term loosely) were there. The doctor came in to see me and he wanted to give me medication. He wanted to give me ativan. I refused. I said he (Adam) took ativan. I don’t want it. The nurse came in and said it isn’t ativan its lorazepam. UMMM HELLLOO, I AM A PHARMACY TECHNICIAN, I KNOW WHAT LORAZEPAM IS, ITS THE GENERIC TO ATIVAN!!!!!! I am NOT dumb. I refused it. I was there for a few hours and at this point I just wanted to leave. I wanted out of that place. My one “friend” had to check herself into the er due to something. Her fiance stayed with me. When the nurse came in, she checked my vitals again. My heart rate was still through the roof. She was worried, but being I was up and moving around and responding and seeming okay she started the discharge process. My friend’s fiance FINALLY spoke up when she gave me a prescription for ativan. He spoke out for me, having heard me say SEVERAL times that I didn’t want that medication. I didn’t want anything, but if they had to give me something, I didn’t want THAT. So they gave me a prescription for valium. It became my savior for a bit when I couldn’t seem to sleep or when the anxiety seemed to be at its worst. Again, everyone KNOWS how I HATE taking medication. If I can go without I will. I will “suffer” through the pain. I hate how medications make me feel. Don’t want that. So I had to go wait for my one friend to come get me (one that showed up at the apartment and insisted I go to the hospital) I was going to stay with her temporarily till we figured things out. She showed up and told me that it took so long to get there because of the fact that they had to FIGHT with the police to get the guinea pigs. The police were gonna ship them off to the humane society to be euthanized. My two friends (Allisa and Robin) are my saviors at this point. They both showed up at the apartment and they BOTH fought to get the guinea pigs. After about three hours they were able to get them. Robin got them all set up at her place. Thank you both!!! You are much appreciated.

The rest of the day isn’t that important being not much happened other than a lot of crying, a lot of refusing medication, finally just giving in. I was tired of closing my eyes and seeing it all over again. I am pretty sure I suffer from PTSD, but I tell someone that and I am told that I am crazy. So who knows.

That week became a blur. I remember cleaning out the apartment and again Allisa and Robin REFUSING me in to begin with. They didn’t know the state of the apartment yet. I did go in later that evening with the bathroom door closed. (It had not been cleaned up). I felt him there. So did everyone else.

There was a lot that happened that week when I moved back to Minnesota. I did find out that my heart is and always will be in Colorado Springs. I am moving back when things become right again. When I am emotionally and financially ready. It became home in the two years I lived there. I don’t know when. Maybe it was when the fire happened. Maybe it was when I found such great friends. Maybe it was when I started college who knows. But I WILL be moving back. It is not oh I might be, I AM.

Now to the part about Adam again. Adam had something called Schitzoaffective disorder and bipolar and depression. We were thinking there was more to it than that, but at the time we were just trying to get the symptoms under control before moving too much more forward. He was hearing voices and he was paranoid. That is all a part of the Schizoaffective disorder. When we moved into the apartment the bed bugs triggered it. It was a BAD trigger. He then ended up with a UTI, causing another trigger. And from after having October happen (the month from hell), he started slipping again. When we moved to the springs things were better. He still had issues, but not as bad as before, in fact he was getting better, but with all the stress added, it made the anxiety worse, which made all the other stuff trigger and happen. Now you add depression and anxiety together you get someone who is a possible suicidal case. Now you add new meds that have a POSSIBLE side effect of being suicidal and you have an explosive mix. We were doing everything we could to get things under control, but they came too late. I feel as if it is partially my fault, but what was I to know that he would fall backwards that far again? Things were going pretty well. For the both of us. We had a rough time in October, but we were pulling through things together. Many don’t understand how bad Adam was. He was pretty bad. In fact he was so bad he was afraid of hurting me due to the voices. He was afraid of doing things because of them. They were strong, and it turns out, a LOT stronger than him. He also suffered from chronic pain. I saw the scans of his back, so don’t say he is a pill addict. His back was MESSED UP. You add the pain to all his other things and that lead to him wanting to end the pain.

I am not mad at him. I know why he did it. Remember, I thought about doing it myself in the ambulance??? Remember I was thinking I can end this pain right here and now?? Why would I be mad at him? He was doing what he thought best for himself and me. Now it wasn’t the best thing, but he wasn’t in his right mind.

Before you question, make sure you understand FULLY what was going on. This will be my LAST description of what happened. I will NOT talk about it again, until I am ready. I want everyone to understand this. If you still have questions either you will have to eat them or you will have to wait till I am ready. I am DONE explaining. It is NOT helping. I lose sleep a lot because of the flash backs and because I am SOO used to sleeping next to him. We were together for 5 and a half years. Lived together for 5 of those years. Slept next to each other almost every night for those five years. I’m still experiencing issues from this experience. I may SEEM happy and ooh lala or what not, but I am not. I just learned to hide these things early on. I learned to hold it in till I got to my bed at night. So many may not EVER see them, unless you are those special few people in my life. And some i don’t show it for fear of burdening them of things on top of what they already have to deal with.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if you are suicidal get help. There is a help line for you. Also there are other resources and people to talk to. Don’t be afraid to tell them. They are there for you!! If you know someone who is suicidal PLEASE don’t ignore it. Life is precious. I hate to see anyone else have to go through what I have had to go through. I want everyone to pay attention. Suicide is NOT a silent killer. Most people reach out before hand in some shape or form. In Adam’s case it was just a little too late. Don’t let it be too late for someone you love/care about.

And with this post I say goodbye to the year from hell and hello to a new year. I hope it is better than the last. It has to be right?

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My Life=Nightmares-NOT adventures

WARNING: SWEARING INVOLVED!!!!!!

 

Who here has heard of the 3 bad things rule??? I have BY FAR SURPASSED THAT RULE. that is FOR SURE.

1. My boyfriends dog gets put to sleep.

2. My boyfriend’s grandma passes away

3. My great grandma passes away

All find and dandy right?? that is three correct? Yes, but is that where it stopped. UMM HELL NO.

4. Issues finding a new apartment

5. Issues finding help move

6. Adam is infected with walking pneumonia

7. Our one guinea pig dies

8. Adam gets bug bites like crazy

9. Have to start living at a hotel because of the fact that our apartment has bed bugs

10. Boy I baby-sat had seizures so bad he had have his brain surgery earlier than expected

11. I have my surgery

12. My right Thyroid was so bad, they had never seen anything like it before.

13. Adam gets admitted to the hospital

14. Ran out of money to stay in hotels

15. Move back into apartment and the bed bugs are STILL here

 

So that is 15 items. Yes I could have grouped some of them, but they all seemed so monumental, and even if you grouped a couple of them together, there is STILL more than 3 things. So where the hell is this rule of three??? I want that rule of three to happen. I need something good to happen. If something good does happen it seems that something bad happens and it surpasses the good by 30 feet. I get a small good. (Thyroid should no longer be a problem) and then get a HUGE bad (Bed bugs are still in the apartment complex).  See what I mean???

Why me? Supposedly God only gives you what you can handle, well, he sure is testing me, because I am about to end up in the loony bin!!! I am not even kidding. I have been on the verge of saying, “FUCK IT”. I am D-O-N-E, DONE. NO MORE, but then something else happens. What else is he gonna throw at me? I don’t think I can deal with anymore BS. If he only hands you what you can handle, then why is he handing me more than I can bear right now??? I just feel like barricading myself in my bathroom and just living there. Just need to figure out the snack issue. Wait, where am I sitting now??? In my small bathroom.  There is NO WAY I could live in this bathroom. Now if we were in our “permanent” appointment I probably could. So I guess for now, I am just gonna hide away in the bathroom for a few minutes and then face the world, AGAIN. With a smile on my face and pretend that all is well after it is said and done. After all, no one truly cares what I have to say or what my feelings are. I mean, why would they? they have their own problems to contend with. They have to deal with their own B.S. I know There are people out there that probably have A LOT more worse off conditions, but sometimes, I just can’t bear the weight on my shoulders anymore. I can sit here and help those people, but in turn, I have to think somewhat selfishly and ask, now what about me?? I helped you, but who is gonna help me move forward? Who is gonna show me they actually care? I hate being used. That is why I am glad I have quite a few friends who ACTUALLY care and for the most part listen. But they have enough issues in their life, they don’t need me butting in. They don’t need me telling them my problems. So, here I am again, at the beginning of the circle and holding everything in, so that I don’t bother others.

 

Well, I am gonna lay down for the 45 minutes so that we can go get our thanksgiving sales for this morning at Kmart. Then come back to clean up, set up our new T.V., move things around in this TINY BUTT apartment to be able to use the stove to start the turkey. and eat Turkey dinner and then go back out to get sales again. Come home, play with the new toys, and then go back out on friday to get our final sale.

 

I appreciate anyone who is reading this ranting. I truly appreciate it. Sometimes I just have to say what I am feeling or I sure am going to explode. If you think all I do is complain, then leave. I do NOT put up with people acting like complete asshats when it comes to M-Y, MY BLOG. I REPEAT MY BLOG. It isn’t your blog, it is MINE. I can write whatever the fuck I want. You don’t have to read it. Hell you can even dislike it, or unfollow it. I do not care. I am not a blogger who focus’ on how many people are actually reading my blog. I blog because this is what I can do to make myself feel better and have a place to put my recipes without having to have TEN different notebooks laying around full of stuff.

 

Blessed Be, and I hope that your life isn’t continuously handing you lemons! Good Luck!

Tosha


WORK, WORK, WORK.

As you guessed it, yes, I got my work-study. I started yesterday. I LOVE my new job! So now I am going to school, taking 3 classes (about 10 credits) and working two jobs. My two jobs combined equal to about 46 hours or more a week! Think I am crazy? You bet. But guess what. I will be going to school FULL TIME in the fall with the same work schedule! I will be taking philosophy (my bird course hopefully. Plus, I LOVED philosophy in high school), Biology (which will be in class instead of online), and of course math! YAY for me! I cannot wait till math is DONE!!!! After this semester, as long as I pass with a C or greater, I will be COMPLETELY done with English! UMM, YESS! LOL. as you can see, I am excited, mostly because of the fact that I am actually FINALLY seeing results with school. I was frustrated at the end of last semester because I felt like I had gotten NOTHING done. With motivation though, I think I can make. I now have about 4 or 5 classes after this semester done for my associates! Isn’t that exciting?

Well, any who, my job. So, you all know I am a nanny three days a week. That is Monday through Wednesday. Usually my schedule is from 7 to about 5 (depends on when they get out of work). The last week of June though the boy with the TBI (refer to previous post about his injuries and story. Traumatic Brain Injury) has to go into the hospital for a week for more testing! Poor kid. They are testing to see if they have to take out more of his brain! Something a kid should not have to deal with. So pray that they find some other type of treatment to help him out! Well, any who, he is going into the hospital for a week, which means one of his parents have to go with. Guess who that is, his dad. Which means I have to keep their moms schedule! FUN! OH well, I get used to it. Also, being I don’t have to get the kids up for school at 7 am it shouldn’t be too bad. Although, the middle child has zoo camp. I have no idea when that starts during the day! 😦 SO that week, I will be up at 4 AM to get ready to head to their house and what not. So that is Monday-Wednesday. Then I work 8-5 Thursday and Friday as an administrative assistant. Sound fun? You bet! It is nice because my boss lets us work on homework. What a relief! So you can see my week schedule is BUSY! Plus add in court to deal with our DISGUSTING landlord (see later paragraph and previous posts), homework (for 3/4 time student), Adam’s home health care stuff, cleaning, organizing, crocheting baby booties and hats, car trouble (see later post. yes more car trouble), and it wouldn’t be life without some money trouble (which is making me think I need to take a third job. Well, technically, fourth job.)

Jobs:

1. Home Health Care Nurse
2. Nanny
3. Administrative Assistant
4. School

How does that life sound? Busy? You bet!

Any who, I had to tell the kids mom that I couldn’t be at work on Monday. I cringed. I hate having to leave her in a lurch, but this landlord BS needs to be solved. ASAP! So, I don’t remember where I left off, but if you read previous posts you knew we were having issues. First with him telling us that we are unable to call the cops. UMMM. If I am not mistaken that is AGAINST THE LAW! Then some other issues. Then on June 1st at about 2 pm he posted that our rent was late. I find something wrong with that. The first wasn’t even over yet! So being June 1st was on a Friday, and it states in our lease that our rent isn’t late till after the 6th of the month, Adam didn’t mail it out till Monday. The third reason was because we were waiting for him to come back and pick it up…well he DIDN’T! Adam called and left a message, he texted him. To no avail, NO RESPONSE! I mean, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Let alone WE had to find his address in order to mail it out. We mailed it certified mail. He still hasn’t picked it up yet! So anyway, last Tuesday, June 5th, he served Adam with papers to show up in court for non-payment! UMMM PICK IT UP DUMBA$$!  Adam filed a counter suit on this last Tuesday when he had to file paperwork with the court. We are gonna sue him for all he is worth! EVERY LAST penny we can get from him! Him harassing me was ENOUGH! I wasn’t going to put up with it! I didn’t want to deal with it anymore. Even though I am working a lot, we have no money to move. It is all going to bills, and car repairs.

Now, car repairs! UGH!! Story of my life huh? You bet. So a couple of weeks ago, Roberta (my van’s name. 😀 LOL), acted up and overheated. Well we refilled her, thinking she just needed more fluid. Well, a week later, she did it again. We filled her up again. This week was the worst. She would not hold fluid for a whole day. I had to keep filling her up every time we stopped and she cooled down enough for me to do it. Well, I couldn’t take her in on Monday or Tuesday because I needed her, the youngest kid had zoo camp and there was no other way to get her there! So, on Wednesday after I met their dad (we played at the park instead of wasting gas driving ALL the way up to their house again), I took her to the “doctor” (mechanic). I sure think that Roberta likes it there! MAN! So we get it there and he thinks it’s the water pump. So he pressurized it. Found out it was a seal. Good right? WRONG! The next day he called Adam and says it sprang another leak. It is under the engine, so in order to get to it, he has to take EVERYTHING out and find out where it’s leaking. Now, I know the price he quoted for labor is high for him, but if I went somewhere else, it would have been like $1000 to $2000 more! So we are hoping and praying it is the water pump and not the head gasket!! PLEASE LORD ALMIGHTY, be on my side this once!!! Another nice thing about our mechanic, no matter how much I gripe about him, he is letting us do payments. He will work out a payment plan. We are thinking about $50 every other week (each pay period of mine), so about $75 to $100 a month. reasonable right? I thought it might be. Some months we may pay a little more depending on money. By then I will have money coming in from my work-study. So we will see. Sad part is, I still am NOT bringing in as much as Adam. I am just behind him by about $100 to $200! How ridiculous is that? So when I get Roberta back, I may also look into doing some dog sitting or walking or something. I don’t know yet. Any who, pray that Roberta is okay and will get back to me in one piece without putting me bankrupt!

So that is my rant and rave for tonight! Man, is that all I do. Well, wait! I had SOME good news! LOL I LOVE my new job! I mean I LOVE It! It is easy and awesome. I wish that one of my co workers worked with me more often, but oh well. Gotta get some rest because I HAVE to go into the school in the morning to do some math tutoring. I am in DESPERATE need of help! Good night world. and I hope you are having some better luck than me this month! 😀

Blessed Be!

P.S. I know I keep saying this, but hopefully I get enough of a break with school work that I can finally add some more recipes. I got A BUNCH of magazines that have LOADS of recipes. I will see what I like and put them in my HUGE stack of recipes to enter! Hopefully soon! I PROMISE! 😀


Quite a week.

So I have had quite the week and yet, it ended pretty well! Started out somewhat okay. Working, lack of sleep, and tons of homework, you know, the normal stuff. One thing that was different, our newspaper delivery person decided that we did not need our paper. So, I had to call on Monday to get it. Still no paper after calling everyday, until today, Friday! Guess what?!?!?! The person delivering it, knocked on our door at 7:30 AM. Now, I wrote a complaint on my own Facebook page and on another thing on facebook. The first person told me that I should give the paper delivery person some slack. UMMMMM…..DO NOT KNOCK ON MY DOOR BEFORE 10 AM and expect me to be happy about it (unless I am not there! :D) Then a friend of mine, who I had gone to high school with, told me I had to STOP complaining! UMM….First off, I am NOT making you read my posts, so in other words, DO NOT READ IT IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT! I was already having lack of sleep. (6 hours over 3 days!) So, that started out the day, that gave me my B&&&&Y attitude for the day. Well, then my insurance card for my car insurance would not print, even after trying two different computers at the library. Well, anywho we went to go register my vehicle and what do you know, we went to the WRONG DMV!!! Did you know that in Colorado Springs there are a few DIFFERENT kinds of DMV’S? Some can do some things, but not other things. So we had to go to another one. My boyfriend told me then, that he doesn’t think that we have enough money to register my van! OMG!! I am already about to pull my hair out! WHY IS MY DAY GOING TO HELL!! And it was only noon!!! I MEAN COME ON!

So we stop by the bank and pulled out what we had and got to the CORRECT DMV! FINALLY! I got there and it took 45 minutes to an hour to reach my number. (Well, at least the number that was right before me!) The guy who was calling the numbers in my set went to lunch! I WAS LIKE WTH?!?!?!?! That’s just the start of my DMV experience today! (The counties, state, and Federal governments ripping us off, is to come in another post.) A lady finally called our number. What I was able to print out for insurance was not good enough. So, I had to all the 800 number to have them fax a copy of the card. Now, things are starting to run more smoothly.

Or so I thought!

She got everything rang up, the price she told us made me crap my pants! I mean SERIOUSLY! $110 just to transfer the title and register the dang thing!!! We obviously did not have enough money. So we just transferred the title and got temporary plates. So, now within 10 days, I have to go in and pay about $70 to register it and get my plates!

Let’s just say that when I talked to my mom, she turned my day around instantly! It only started to get better after that. Things started getting done! We got home, I got to my car and did my few errands that I had to do. Then it was time to hang with Kelly! SWEET! We acted like we were drunk, ALL NIGHT! And get this, there was NO alcohol in my system whatsoever!

I cannot wait until I can hang with Kelly again! Possibly a bonfire is in the near future!

Ciao for now, and again IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT, GO AWAY!